What I’ve learned from 30 years of marriage—marriage isn’t always candlelight and butterflies. Sometimes, it looks a lot more like dishes in the sink, two ships passing in the night, or silent scrolling side by side in bed.

But here’s the thing: just because the spark has dimmed doesn’t mean it’s gone. It just might need a little tending.

Whether you’ve been married 5 years or 55, it’s totally normal to go through seasons where you feel disconnected, misunderstood, or stuck in autopilot. The good news? It doesn’t have to stay that way.