A gentler way to do the holidays (without guilt)

We’re told the holidays are the most wonderful time of the year.
And yet… for so many women, they quietly become the most exhausting.

The calendar fills. The to-do list grows teeth. The one stretch of time you finally “allow” yourself to slow down gets swallowed by obligations, events, meals, and expectations. By the time January arrives, you’re depleted and already craving another break.

There is another way.
A calmer, more intentional way to move through the season—one that actually feels like a holiday, not a marathon.

Here’s how to create a more restful holiday for yourself and the people you love.

Rest from visiting everyone

Endless visits can leave you feeling like you’re performing the holidays instead of living them.

Sit down with your partner and decide what truly matters this year. Which gatherings feel meaningful? Which ones are done out of guilt, habit, or pressure? Prioritize your immediate family and the traditions that ground you.

Yes, this might disappoint some people. But choosing fewer, more intentional connections often leads to deeper, more nourishing time together for everyone involved.

Rest from cooking all the things

Holiday cooking can be beautiful and nostalgic… and it can also quietly fall on one person’s shoulders while everyone else relaxes.

If cooking lights you up, keep it.
If it drains you, let it go.

Order takeout. Choose a non-traditional holiday meal. Create a new ritual that frees you from the kitchen and puts you back in the moment. Rest doesn’t mean you care less, it means you’re choosing presence over performance.

Rest from rushing gift time

So much energy goes into buying, wrapping, decorating… only for everything to be over in minutes.

Slow it down.

Try opening gifts one at a time, together. Let everyone witness the exchange. Let gratitude and connection stretch out the moment instead of racing past it. It may take some adjustment—especially for younger ones—but the payoff is real connection during a time meant for exactly that.

Rest for rest’s sake

Choose at least one day where nothing is required of you.

Stay in pajamas. Drink something warm. Watch movies. Read. Nap. Let everyone do their own thing in the same space. No productivity. No agenda.

This isn’t laziness.
It’s restoration.

Make your holiday feel like an actual holiday.

Rest from the year itself

Finally, give yourself space to pause and reflect.

What stretched you this year?
What changed you?
What are you proud of?
What are you ready to leave behind?

This can be done alone, with your partner, or as a family. The goal isn’t to rush into the next chapter—but to consciously close the one you’re in.

The holidays don’t have to be overcommitted and overwhelming.

You’re allowed to do them differently.
You’re allowed to choose rest.
You’re allowed to let this season nourish you instead of drain you.

When you intentionally ritualize rest, you create a holiday that feels calmer, more meaningful, and far more aligned with the life you’re building—one choice at a time.